Dealing With Anxiety

Anxiety is a condition more common than most of us think, as people with the issue often hide it. While we may say it’s normal, it can be disruptive and make us feel out of control. This guide shows you how to deal with anxiety from various angles.

Relieving the tension due to anxiety

Anxiety can cause much tension in the body, which can lead to further anxiety. So, it’s important to relieve yourself of the tension, which actually reduces your anxiety too.

Notice how your body feels. Breathe. Keep breathing in a relaxed way as you feel your body.

If there are anxious thoughts—be they related to current matters or long-gone events—don’t give them any special attention. You may find it useful to remind yourself repeatedly, “Thoughts are just thoughts. Feelings are just feelings.”

As you do the above, don’t try to do anything to the tension or the thoughts. Just keep breathing relaxingly as you feel your body. Do this as often as you can throughout the day.

When you want to sleep, or have some spare time, you can do this while lying down. Just lie down in whichever way you feel comfortable. Start feeling your body from somewhere that is quite relaxed. Let’s assume that’s your legs. Breathe. Relax. Keep doing this until doing so doesn’t bring about any further relaxation. Then move your attention a little further up the body and do the same. As you do this, you may experience relaxation in parts of the body other than where you’re deliberately feeling, which is of course just fine.

Keep doing the above until you’re done with the whole body. If you still feel some kind of tension, it may be at the muscles deep within the back attaching to the spine. Try feeling around the spine, and do the same: breathe, relax.

As you do the above, you may experience jerks. That’s okay. They are just due to sudden releasing of clogged up energy. If you burp and fart, that’s good too. With that, you should experience noticeable relief in tension.

NOTE: Relaxing is just releasing muscle contraction. You only need to allow that to happen. If you force yourself to relax, that itself creates tension. So, no forcing.

If you find it difficult to relax, stop trying. Instead, check if you’re disliking or resisting. If you are, watch that instead. With that, the disliking or resisting may subside, thus allowing you to relax.

If that does not work, there may be a physical issue preventing you from relaxing. I suggest seeing an Ayurveda doctor.

Persisting in the above will gradually reduce tension and anxiety, but cannot eliminate them. Certain things will still trigger you to have anxious episodes. This is because there are perceptions in you that need to be addressed.

Undoing the cause of anxiety

If and when the anxiety isn’t so strong that it disrupts your daily functioning, this is a suitable time for you to identify and examine the perceptions that are causing the anxiety.

I recommend using The Work of Byron Katie to inquire into them. I also recommend reading Reinventing Your Life by Jeffrey Young & Janet Klosko. You’ll likely find the mental patterns which are the core of your anxiety issue, and the steps to be free from them. If you find this book too hard to read or the steps too hard to follow, then consider seeking help from a competent psychotherapist. I suggest seeing someone trained in Schema Therapy.

Understanding anxiety as it is

Even if the anxiety is subtle, don’t look down on it. Subtle anxiety still causes subtle tension that can gradually build up and cause you significant problems, such as sleeping disorders.

This is where meditation is very useful. Physical posture is not particularly important, but mental posture (i.e. attitude) is. Here’s what you do.

Regard anxiety as it is. Have this view: Anxiety is just anxiety. View it as just a natural phenomenon, not as something belonging to you.

Also, don’t try to get rid of or resist the anxiety, because doing that merely causes more tension and anxiety. However, if you do find yourself reacting in any way, that’s okay. Just watch that reaction as it is. In doing so, the reaction may fade away. (However, if it increases instead, then return to the instructions under the first heading "Relieving the tension due to anxiety".) If you do this regularly enough, you might become more composed than you’ve ever been.

When you are able to regard anxiety as it is and not react to it, you can then watch anxiety for understanding. At this level of anxiety, you may not notice any thoughts (as in inner talk) that are causing the anxiety. Yet the presence of anxiety suggests that at least one perception is doing that.

So, what is the anxiety about? Just be interested to know. No expectations. If you don’t get to know what the anxiety is about, it’s okay. If you do get to know, you can take a further step of inquiring into the matter using The Work of Byron Katie as mentioned earlier.

A few more tips

Don’t be anxious to be free from anxiety. That’s adding fuel to the fire. Just stick to doing what you need to do to be free from anxiety, and you’re already moving in the right direction.

It may at times seem hopeless. That’s understandable. Rest if you must, but don’t quit.

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